One Last Love (11 page)

*****

‘Aren’t you getting blown to bits out there?’ Mary said as she popped her head through Bonnie’s terrace door.

‘A bit of fresh air never hurt anyone.’

‘So, ready for a shower Bonnie?’

‘Sooner it’s done I suppose,’ he said as he started to wheel himself. Mary walked through the door and took over, pushing Bonnie towards the bathroom. He was tempted to ask Mary if she knew who Jacobs & Sons were collecting this morning but decided against it – he really didn’t want to know. Whoever it was going out the back door would be replaced by someone coming in the front door soon enough.

‘You and Madeleine seem to be getting on well,’ Mary said as she wheeled him inside and Bonnie heard the sound of condescendence in her tone.

‘Yes, nice woman,’ he replied while thinking that it was none of her bloody business and that she was probably giggling along with the other nurses at them occasionally holding hands. The young thinking that being attracted to someone was solely their own province. He wondered if Mary was laying on her back for someone, then dropped it from his mind – as it didn’t matter at all. As Mary wheeled him into the bathroom and started preparing him for his shower, he remained quiet, thinking about the almost military routine that his final days were taking. Probably couldn’t be any other way he thought, as the nurses, orderlies and doctors all went about their work according to their rosters of plastic smiles. The water felt good on his back and chest.

‘Your pills Bonnie,’ Mary said after she had finished with showering and dressing him and had returned him to his room. He took them, split them in half and then swallowed them down with a glass of water. ‘Anything else you need?’

‘No, I’m fine. Thanks Mary.’

Bonnie wheeled over towards the window and looked out at the day as the clouds started thinning with the help of the wind. Warm sunshine now coming through his window warming his legs – it was just after eight. His mind drifted, bringing flashes from his life. Of teaching Colin how to swim and how to use a hammer without banging his thumb. Of the picnic near Pickhold Dam with Carol and Colin when they’d managed to lay their picnic blanket atop a bull ants nest and then had to empty a bottle of Calamine Lotion on themselves when they got home. Colin’s first day at school in his little blue and grey uniform and brown sandals, standing on the front porch nervously as Carol took his photo with their Box Brownie. The photo must be somewhere he though as he realised he hadn’t seen it in years – perhaps in a cardboard box somewhere in the hall closet back at his flat, which brought the mystery to Bonnie’s mind as to who would send all his things to the Salvo’s in a little while and what would the Salvo’s think was of any use. Certainly not a photo of a little boy in brown sandals wearing a frightened smile.

‘Good morning Bonnie. Are the pills helping?’ Dr. McManus asked as he bowled into Bonnie’s room, obviously on his morning rounds and probably eager to finish them early for a round of golf in the afternoon.

‘Yes, much better.’

‘Is the pain consistent, or does it peak and trough?’

‘Fairly consistent I suppose, but not too bad unless I move too quickly. The right shoulder’s the worst, but if I don’t move my arm too much it’s ok.’

‘And no nausea?’

‘None at all.’

‘Ok,’ he said as he took the file from its receptacle at the foot of Bonnie’s bed and read the nurses’ notes. ‘If the pain gets worse I can increase your dosage a little but not by much.’

‘Then after that it’s time to knock me out for good huh?’

‘Have you spoken with the counsellor at all?’

‘Yes, he popped in and I asked him to pop straight back out.’

‘It sometimes helps to talk.’

‘Never been one for gossiping about myself Doc.’

‘Alright, I understand. Now, is there anything else Bonnie?’

‘Just don’t tell me to give up smoking,’ he smiled.

‘Not a word, I promise.’

‘Look, just one question Doc.’

‘Sure.’

‘Do you think I’ve got a few days?’

‘In truth, it’s always very hard to say.’

‘A guess then?’

‘Look Bonnie, pain is usually one of the main signals that things are deteriorating, so as this seems manageable for the moment, I’d guess, as you say, that this may continue for next couple or perhaps a few days. I can’t promise you anything though. It’s really up to your body Bonnie. There’s little I can do except ….’

‘I know. Keep me as comfortable as possible.’

‘You know the score then.’

‘Yep. Look, thanks for being honest.’

Once Dr. McManus had left, Bonnie wheeled himself out on to his terrace again and lit a smoke after intentionally forgetting his little ashtray once more.

‘Never heard that littering was a capital offence,’ he thought to himself and decided that the cleaners could only complain for as long as he could keep smoking – and breathing. He took another puff with self satisfied smugness at his decision.

The wind had died down, the clouds had cleared, and it was turning into another beautiful northern day. Bonnie sat quietly, puffing on his smoke and enjoying the view while he waited for ten-thirty and morning tea in the dining room with Madeleine. He wondered what she’d discussed with Dr. McManus this morning. A few more days too?

*****

‘Nice smile.’

‘Well, thank you Bonnie. Where’s yours?’

‘I keep it locked up ‘cause I’ve got really crappy teeth.’

‘So that’s your excuse. And here I was thinking you were just very serious.’

‘Oh I am Madeleine, very serious,’ Bonnie said as he sat down at the table with her.

‘So what are you so serious about this fine morning?’ she asked as she placed her hand on his.

‘You I believe.’

‘Oh Bonnie,’ she said and turned her head a little to hide a tear that was nearing escape.

‘I’d like to sit in the rose garden after our coffee. What do you think?’

‘Yes, a wonderful idea. I’d love that,’ she said as she wiped away the offending tear with her finger.

‘Me too. Coffee or tea?’

‘Tea thanks.’

‘Well, if it was coffee I’d go get it for you, but you’d better come with me then ‘cause I’m useless at making tea. Never know what goes in first.’

‘Oh you are something Bonnie,’ she said with a smile. ‘Well, I can manage both, so why don’t you just sit here while I get the coffee and tea?’

‘You couldn’t get my slippers on the way could you?’

‘Oh Bonnie,’ Madeleine said as she got up and playfully smacked his hand. ‘The newspaper as well?’

‘If it’s no trouble,’ he smiled and mockingly ducked his head a little as Madeleine raised her hand in jest.

‘Right. Slippers, newspaper and coffee with one sugar and two hemlocks coming up my good man.’

‘You’re a real darlin’, you know.’

Madeleine smiled as she left to get the tea and coffee and Bonnie couldn’t help but notice that she was limping a little more. He wouldn’t ask. While he waited, he thought about Danny’s empty room. He’d stopped on his way to meet Madeleine and found orderlies preparing Danny’s room for a new arrival. ‘So he’s gone then?’ he’d asked one of the orderlies who politely replied, ‘Yes, sorry Bonnie.’ While he felt sad that Danny had gone, his thoughts were more about Angeline and how she would handle the news. But perhaps she was immune to the revolving door as much as Bonnie now understood he had to be as well. The reality was that. No one stayed very long in the Dead End Hotel. He pushed the thought from his mind and instead, watched as Madeleine prepared their coffee and tea at the table near the servery.

‘There you go you my dear slave master,’ Madeleine said as she arrived she put the cups down on the table. ‘With just an added touch of rat poison,’ she laughed.

‘Always goes well with hemlock I find.’

‘Oh you’re a bugger Bonnie.’

‘Too late to change my stripes now.’

‘Well, I happen to like your stripes, so don’t bother trying to change.’

‘Um,’ Bonnie started to say.

‘Sounds serious.’

‘Oh no, I was just wondering about something.’

‘And?’

‘Well, do you think…..,’ Bonnie began to say but was cut short by Angeline appearing at the dining room door, smiling.’

‘Thought I might find you two here.’

‘Oh, good morning Angeline,’ Madeleine said warmly. ‘Please, come and join us.’

‘How ya’ goin’ then Nancy?’ Bonnie said as she wheeled to their table.

‘You know. Up and down, in and out, back and forth.’

‘Know what you mean Nancy. Can I get you something?’ Bonnie asked.

‘Um, a coffee, but I can get it.’

‘No, sit there, I’ll get it,’ he insisted and rolled himself away towards the coffee pot.

‘He’s so nice isn’t he?’ Angeline said in a whisper.

‘Yes, he’s a very nice man,’ Madeleine replied with a smile.

‘And, you’re a bit keen on him hey?’

‘Is it that obvious?’

‘Very I’d say,’ she smiled.

‘So much for my famous discretion then.’

‘Oh I think it’s wonderful. And Bonnie’s face just glows when he’s with you. Never too late you know.’

‘Too late for what?’

‘To fall in love.’

‘Oh, don’t be silly. At our age? Oh dear me no.’

‘Fight if you like Madeleine. But, if you want my opinion, just go for it.’

‘Are you sure you’re not related to Bonnie? I sense an in your face directness you both share,’ she said with a broad smile.

‘Well, here he comes. I’ll keep mum about it.’

‘Good idea I think.’

‘Oh thanks Bonnie,’ Angeline said as he placed he coffee on the table in front of her. ‘You’re a darl’.’

‘I know.’

‘And so modest,’ Madeleine added.

‘I’ll have you know, I’m extremely famous for my modesty, and good looks.’

‘Oh, I didn’t realise you were famous Bonnie,’ Angeline said.

‘Yes. It’s a well known fact that I turned down the leading role in Gone With The Wind and let some bloke, Clark something or other do it.’

‘Well, you were probably a bit young Bonnie,’ Madeleine said. ‘What? You were about five or six at the time?’

‘Seven I think. But it’s always been a regret,’ he laughed.

‘Oh Bonnie, are you ever serious about anything?’ Madeleine smiled.

‘Only about a smoke I reckon,’ Angeline added.

‘And finding a way to get beer served around here,’ he said with a smile.

‘I’ll have a word with the boss for you. We’re like this,’ she said as she crossed her fingers.

‘Right Nancy. I’ll expect success by dinner time.’

‘Done deal Bonnie. I’ll turn this place into a real pub for you.’

‘Well, if you can manage a good Bloody Mary as well, I’d be grateful,’ Madeleine added.

‘Wow. Looks like I’ve got some work to do today,’ Angeline laughed.

‘Leave it with you Nancy. I’ll take a double dose of my pills to make sure I make it back here for dinner,’ he said as he laughed with her.

‘Um, I suppose you know Danny left this morning,’ Angeline said, changing the mood at the table in a split second.

‘Yes,’ Bonnie said starting to understand how Angeline managed loss. It was as if she needed to address it once – to tell someone – then as she had rid herself of it, erase it from her mind and then moved on as if it had never happened.

‘Oh, I’m so sorry to hear,’ Madeleine added.

‘I saw his mum for a little while. She gave me a hug.’

‘That’s nice,’ Bonnie said not knowing what he could say. Madeleine stayed silent.

‘Apparently his dad never came to grips with it all,’ Angeline said as if talking to the walls of the room.

‘That can happen Nancy. It’s never easy.’

‘But I know he liked you Bonnie. He told me he thought it was so funny you calling him a pufta and how you accepted him so easily. In your own way of course,’ she said and paused. ‘Anyway, you should know you made him happy. But you specialise in that, don’t you Bonnie?’

‘In what?’

‘Making people happy silly Billy,’ Angeline smiled and Bonnie knew she had now erased Danny. She had cleansed her mind of him.

‘I’ll add my vote to that,’ Madeleine said and Angeline smiled back at her.

‘Geeez, there goes my grumpy old bastard reputation then.’

‘You’ve been exposed, you grumpy old bastard,’ Madeleine said with a broad smile.

‘You try hard Bonnie,’ Angeline said. ‘But we all can see through your ruse.’

‘I’ll try harder then.’

‘No need Bonnie, you’ll be wasting your time,’ Angeline said.

‘Maybe I’ll ask Mary if she has some grumpy pills you can take,’ Madeleine said as she placed her hand on Bonnie’s. ‘That’ll fix it.’

‘Oh I’ve heard of uppers and downers, so there’s surely some grumpers too,’ Angeline laughed.

‘You two’ll be the death of me,’ Bonnie was about to say, then changed his mind. ‘I think my old friends nicotine and alcohol will suffice,’ he said instead.

‘Well, I’ll have to love and leave you two,’ Angeline said. ‘Time to get my drain attended to.’

‘Maybe we’ll catch up later?’ Madeleine said.

‘Hope so.’

‘Me too Nancy,’ Bonnie added.

‘Looks like you two’re popular today,’ Angeline said as she started to turn her wheelchair and noticed Charlie coming through the door. ‘Kept a seat warm for you,’ she said as he entered and she left.

‘Thank you,’ he said as he passed her.

‘Do you mind?’ he asked Bonnie and Madeleine.

‘Of course not, sit and join us,’ Bonnie said.

‘I’ll just grab a cup of tea,’ Charlie said as he headed off to the self-service table.

‘It’s like a bloody railway station huh?’ Bonnie laughed and Madeleine nodded and smiled.

‘So, how’re you doin’ Charlie?’ Bonnie asked as Charlie returned with his tea and sat down.

‘Oh, no complaints. It’s a bit of a routine around here in the mornings so I like to escape the nurses, orderlies and doctors all running around trying to do their morning routines.’

‘I know what you mean. Feels like they all want to get done what they have to do and free up their afternoons for a game of golf,’ Bonnie said.

‘Well, the doctors anyway,’ Madeleine added.

‘They all seem to disappear in the afternoon, so you might be right. Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a doctor in the afternoon, so you’re more than likely right Madeleine.’