Halfway to Forever (15 page)

But there was something very real and logical about the woman’s story. She knew Grace’s full name and birth date and had examples of what the child liked to eat and wear and watch on television. The grandmother lived in Oklahoma and promised to fax in documentation proving she was Leslie Landers’s mother and showing that she had the means to permanently care for little Grace.

The woman suffered from arthritis and lived on a disability pension and the retirement funds from her deceased husband. She was slow, but not crippled, she explained. “I can care for Grace, no problem. She’s a sweet child; she knows I don’t get around very well.”

By all preliminary standards, Patsy Landers seemed well enough to be named the child’s legal guardian, but that didn’t make the situation any easier. After all, Grace was adapting beautifully with the Bronzans. Edna had been by their house a few days earlier and had been moved to tears watching Grace run on the beach with her new sister. Hannah and Matt said the change in their family had been miraculous.

“It’s like she’s always been our little girl,” Hannah told Edna when she gathered her things and left that day.

Edna’s throat swelled with sorrow. She’d done everything she could to see that something like this wouldn’t happen, but still it had. These sorts of disruptions in foster-adopt homes weren’t supposed to happen! Leslie Landers had said her mother was dead, after all. Of course, Edna had realized the woman could be lying, so she had done a national name search on Patsy Landers—just to
verify that the woman was indeed dead. When nothing turned up, Edna assumed Leslie was telling the truth—but Patsy was listed under the name of her second husband, a man who had passed away a decade ago.

It didn’t matter now. None of that would help the Bronzans once Edna notified them of Grace’s grandmother’s intentions.

Losing Grace would be overwhelming to people like the Bronzans, people who had suffered so much loss already.

Edna wanted to go home, shut herself in her bedroom, and cry for a week. But she knew there was something she had to do first. Not now, not until she had the proper documentation from the woman in Oklahoma, but as soon as she did there’d be no way around it.

She would have to call the Bronzans and tell them the truth.

A
month into the medication, Jade was still herself—no personality changes, no shuffling gait, no slurred speech or memory loss.

She felt tired, but nothing worse.

It was the end of July and Tanner had been home from Colorado for nearly a week. He seemed less distant, more willing to share with her, talk to her. Whatever had happened while he was gone, the change had been a good thing. In fact, everything about life seemed better than ever lately, and Jade couldn’t help but thank God with every breath she drew.

Not only that, but the tumor seemed to be staying about the same size—something Dr. Layton said was nothing short of miraculous, considering pregnancy was often the worst time for cancer to hit. Meanwhile, her nausea had let up and she was beginning to feel the first fluttering of movement deep within her, movement that meant their baby was alive and well.

The whole of it was enough to make Jade sing her way through the days, sure that somehow when she reached the end of her battle with cancer, she would emerge victorious. She and Tanner and Ty and the baby. All of them together, without fear of anything else happening to them.

Of course, every now and then there were still times when she wondered if the tumor was God’s way of punishing her for what happened with her and Jim Rudolph. But most often, she refused to allow those thoughts a chance to develop. Yes, she’d made mistakes in her marriage to Jim, but she’d done everything in her
power to rectify them. There was no point wallowing in guilt now.

“You have to stay positive,” Hannah told her every time they were together. “Keep believing God will get you through this. That’s where your thoughts should be.”

And that’s exactly where Jade intended to keep them.

She finished her salad, drank a glass of water, and sat herself down at the computer. A friend from the hospital had told her about herbal vitamin tablets she could purchase online. The blend was designed to bolster the immune system of pregnant women who were battling cancer.

Jade found the web site, read up on the tablets, and ordered a three-month supply. Then she checked the mirror and headed for the hospital. It was just after noon, and she had an ultrasound scheduled for two o’clock. An ultrasound that would most likely tell her the information she and Tanner were dying to know—whether the child she was carrying was a girl or a boy.

As she made her way into the hospital parking lot, Jade remembered a conversation she and Tanner had shared the night before.

“It doesn’t matter to me; you know that, right?” They were lying on their sides, their faces inches apart, wrapped in each other’s arms.

“I know.” Jade brushed her lips against his. “But what if I can’t have more kids?”

“Well …” Tanner smoothed her hair back from her forehead. “Then I’d say a little boy would have Ty as the best big brother in the world.” He hesitated and touched his lips to her brow. “And a little girl would be a priceless gift … priceless beyond anything I could imagine.”

His words ran through Jade’s mind as she entered the hospital and headed upstairs to the children’s ward, where she had worked before taking leave. It had been that long since she’d seen her
patients, and there was one in particular she wanted to check on.

Jade made her way off the elevator and greeted her friends at the nurse’s station, all of whom were full of compliments and thrilled to see her up and around. After several minutes, Jade motioned down the hall.

“How’s Brandy Almond?”

The eyes of several of the nurses lit up. “She’s doing better,” one of them said. “There’s something different about her. Go see for yourself.”

Jade grinned and hurried toward the girl’s room, knocking on her door before opening it and stepping inside.

“You came!” Brandy was sitting up in bed, her cheeks full and more colorful than they’d been. “They told me you were going to have a baby!”

Jade hesitated for a moment. Was that all they’d told the young girl? That she was having a baby? Nothing about the brain cancer? Jade swallowed and considered her choice of words. “Yes. That’s right.” She placed her hand over her abdomen. “An active baby, by the way my insides feel.”

Brandy’s eyes danced. “You’ll name her after me if it’s a girl, right?”

“Absolutely.” Jade laughed and sat on the edge of Brandy’s bed. “Enough about me. Look at you, Brandy. You’re glowing. Like you’re ready to run a race or something.”

The girl beamed. “I’m getting better. Just like you prayed.”

“What?” Jade raised her eyebrows. “Brandy Almond? Talking about prayer?”

Was she …? Did the girl believe now? Was that the difference?

Tears filled Brandy’s eyes. “After our talk I decided to give it a try. I told God I’d believe He was real if He’d send me a sign of some kind. Some way so I’d know it was right to trust Him.”

“And …” Jade marveled at the light in Brandy’s eyes. It was a
light that couldn’t be manufactured. Jade could hardly wait to hear what had happened to convince Brandy of the truth.

“The next day one of my teammates came in with a Bible.” Brandy smiled. “Can you believe that? Just out of the blue for no reason.”

Brandy’s energy never waned as she shared the story of what happened. The girl approached Brandy and told her she’d been praying for her every day since she’d gotten sick. But that afternoon, the teammate felt sure God wanted her to bring Brandy a Bible and share the truth of Jesus with her.

“ ‘It doesn’t matter so much whether you run again or even if you get better,’ she told me. ‘But if you miss out on knowing Jesus … that’ll be a real tragedy.’ ”

Brandy took the girl’s visit as the sign she’d prayed for. “She told me about Jesus and placing my faith in Him. She said if I trusted Him, I’d go to heaven one day.”

“And you agreed?” Jade squirmed in her seat, her heart bursting with joy. She took Brandy’s hands in her own and squeezed them.

“Yes! I’d be crazy not to. All of a sudden it was like I got it. This Jesus you always talked about, the one my teammate loved, He was not only real, but He loved me. I didn’t want to wait another minute to accept that love and start loving Him back.”

“Oh, Brandy, that’s wonderful.” Jade leaned over and hugged the girl close. “You’ll never be sorry. And your health …” Jade stood and checked the chart near Brandy’s door. “You look so much better.”

A laugh bubbled up from Brandy’s throat, and she clasped her hands. “Doctor says if my counts stay good for another week I can go home. I’m in remission, Jade. They thought I was done for, and now I’m in remission. Isn’t that, like … so
God?”

Jade fired a grin at Brandy. “Yes, it’s definitely, like, so God!”

The file told the story. Jade read it and shook her head. The girl was right; her blood counts had been excellent for the past three weeks. She returned to Brandy’s side, hoping she would never find out about the brain cancer.

The expression on Brandy’s face changed. “Now tell me why you took off work so early. Don’t most people wait until the baby’s about to come?”

Jade’s pulse quickened.
Give me the words, God … please
. “Yes.” She searched her mind for something to say. “But, uh, my morning sickness was worse than most.” She lifted one shoulder. “I was too tired to work.”

The answer pacified Brandy, and the two of them talked for another thirty minutes before Jade told the girl good-bye. “I have an ultrasound downstairs.” She grinned at Brandy. “In an hour I should know if we’re having a girl or a boy.”

Brandy waved a finger at Jade, her face masked in mock seriousness. “Don’t forget, now. If it’s a girl, you name her after me.” Her eyes sparkled. “Hey, and you can bring her to one of my track meets next year!”

“We wouldn’t miss it.” Jade laughed. “Get some rest, Brandy. And if they spring you next week, don’t forget to stop by and visit.”

Brandy grew quiet and she reached her hand toward Jade once more. “No matter what happens, Jade, I’ll never forget you.”

Sudden tears burned at Jade’s eyes and she took the girl’s fingers in her own. “I won’t forget you, either.”

“You saved my life; you know that, right? I was ready to give up, and you told me to pray. Otherwise …”

“Otherwise someone else would have told you.” Jade brushed away a tear, leaned over, and kissed the girl on the cheek.

But Brandy shook her head. “No, otherwise I might already be gone.”

There was a lump in Jade’s throat, and she couldn’t speak. Instead she shrugged and pointed heavenward.

“Have that little baby and hurry back, okay, Jade?” Brandy’s voice broke and her eyes grew wet. “The kids here need you.”

The conversation with Brandy played again and again in Jade’s head as she made her way downstairs toward the ultrasound room.
Thank You, God … thank You for healing her. Thank You for sending her teammate that day … thank You
.

Only one part of what the girl had said didn’t sit well with Jade.

The part about hurrying back. It wasn’t that Jade didn’t want to return to her hospital work. Rather, she had stopped making plans that far in the future. As though to do so might be presuming on God’s blessing.

She checked in and was ushered to a changing room where she slipped into the blue and white medical gown.
Let me get through the pregnancy, God. Please. My return to work can come later
.

While Jade waited, she wondered again if the baby within her was a boy or a girl. All her life she had wanted a daughter, a girl of her own to mother the way she herself had never been mothered. Deep in her heart, Jade was sure a daughter would be God’s way of smiling through the fog of uncertainty caused by Jade’s cancer. It would be His way of telling her everything was going to be okay, that He had heard the desires of her heart and now was granting her those desires, even amidst the fear of the unknown.

Of course, a boy would be wonderful as well, a smaller version of Ty, another son to follow in Tanner’s footsteps.

The minutes crawled by, and finally half an hour later the technician was ready for her. The young woman wasn’t someone Jade knew, but she was kind and gentle and not overly effusive. Though the technician didn’t say anything about the cancer, Jade had a feeling she knew.

While the woman positioned the ultrasound wand over her stomach, Jade remembered how terrifying it had been the first time she was pregnant. She hadn’t sought medical care until she was several months along so Jim wouldn’t be suspicious.

I never should have married him, Lord. I’m so sorry. If I had it to do over again, I’d wait and talk to Tanner first. I wouldn’t have trusted Doris Eastman’s story until I had a chance to—

“There’s a pretty clear picture.” The technician smiled and froze the image.

Jade stared at it, but being a nurse didn’t help her much. She wasn’t sure what she was seeing. Reading ultrasounds required special training. She grinned at the woman and shrugged her shoulders. “What are we looking at?”

“Well, I’d say she’s about as perfect as a baby can be. She looks completely healthy.”

“She?”
Tears nipped at the corners of Jade’s eyes. Was it possible? Had God allowed her another chance to mother a little girl?

“I’m sorry.” The technician looked surprised. “I thought you knew.” She looked back at the screen and pointed to the baby. “There’s no doubt about it. You’re having a girl, Mrs. Eastman.”

Jade blinked back the tears and closed her eyes, allowing herself a moment’s privacy. God was going to let her survive after all. Otherwise He wouldn’t have blessed her with a little girl; He wouldn’t have let the baby live this long, past the point when Jade had miscarried the last time. Happiness shot through her veins, infusing hope to every part of her being. Yes, she was going to survive.

She could hardly wait to tell Tanner.