Forgiven but Not Forgotten? (4 page)

Siena’s belly clenched hard. She could remember impatiently undoing his shirt buttons that night in Paris, ripping his tie open...

Andreas was looking around the bare corridor. Someone was shouting in a nearby flat and then something smashed against a door, making Siena flinch.

Andreas cursed and took the keys out of her numb fingers. ‘Let’s get you inside.’

He was doing it again. Taking command, all but pushing her through the door into a bare and forlorn-looking space filled with stained carpet. Siena had done her best to get rid of the stains, with little success. She only hoped that they weren’t what she thought they were...

Siena put on her one small lamp and regretted it as soon as she did so, because it sent out a far too seductive pink and warm glow. Feeling thoroughly threatened now, she put out her hand for her keys and snapped, ‘You’ve seen me safely in—now, please leave.’

Looking supremely at ease, Andreas just shut the door behind him and said softly, ‘This must be hard for you...’

Siena went very still and her hand dropped to her side. He had no idea...how
easy
this had been for her. To leave behind the tainted trappings of suffocating wealth and excess had been a relief. But that was something no one would ever understand. She’d certainly never be explaining it to
this
man, who had grabbed onto success and wealth with both hands and was thoroughly enjoying it. And could she begrudge him that? Even if his methods were dubious? Of course not. She had given up that right five years before.

She put her hand out again for her keys. ‘I have to be up early for work.’

Andreas didn’t move. He just looked at her, those dark, unreadable eyes roving over her face and over her hair, which was tumbled around her shoulders now, making Siena want to drag it back, tie it up.

Feeling desperate, she said,
‘Please.’

‘But what if you didn’t have to get up early?’

Siena blinked at Andreas, not understanding him. She shook her head. ‘What do you mean? I start work at six-thirty a.m. It takes me an hour to get there...’

Andreas’s face was so starkly beautiful in the dim light that she could feel herself being hypnotised. Much as she had been when she’d stood in front of him in that hotel boutique shop, in that dress. She’d taken it off after that night and thrown it in the bin, unable to look at it and not feel sickened.

He said now in a silky tone, ‘What I mean is that you have a choice, Siena... I’d like to offer you an alternative.’

It took a second...but then his words sank in along with the very explicit look in his eyes. Since she’d been in England other men had posed much the same question—like the man who had come back to get something from his hotel room and found her making his bed. Except what he’d been offering had been stated in much cruder terms.

Shame and something much hotter curled through her belly, making self-disgust rise. She took a sidestep back and injected as much icy disdain as she could into her voice. ‘If you’re suggesting what I think you’re suggesting then clearly you refuse to believe that I want you to leave me alone.’

Andreas took a step closer and panic spiked in Siena, making her take another step back. She felt out of her depth and unbelievably vulnerable. All of the familiar surroundings of her old life were gone. The part she’d played had been as good as scripted. Now she was utterly defenceless, and the one man in the world who hated her guts was propositioning her. And she hated that it didn’t disgust her the way it should.

He reached out to trail a finger down one cheek, across her jawbone and down to where the pulse beat hectically under her skin at her throat. ‘Even now you affect disgust, but your body betrays you. What happened in Paris...you were as involved as I was—as hot and eager as anything I’ve ever seen. And yet you didn’t hesitate to shift the blame to me to keep yourself pure in your father’s bigoted eyes. God forbid the untouchable heiress had been rolling around on a chair with a mere hotel employee.’

Siena slapped his hand away and stepped back, hating how breathy she sounded. ‘Get out of here now, Xenakis. Rehashing the past is of no use.’

The anger Andreas had been keeping in check spilled over into his voice. ‘You can’t bring yourself to offer up even the most grudging of apologies, can you? Even now, when you don’t have a cent to your name or a reputation to safeguard.’

Shame gripped Siena—and guilt. Ineffectually she said, ‘I...am...sorry.’

Derision laced Andreas’s voiceas he sneered, ‘Spare me the insincere apology when it’s all but dragged from you.’

His face was suddenly etched with self-disgust, and he half turned from Siena, raking his hair with a hand. She had a vivid memory of seeing him the following morning, shocked at his black eye and swollen jaw. Evidence of her father’s men’s dirty work. She’d tried to apologise then, but hadn’t been able to speak over his very justified wrath.

Contrition and a stark desire to assure him that she
was
truly
sorry made her reach out impulsively to touch his sleeve. She dropped her hand hurriedly when he looked at her suspiciously. She gulped under his almost black gaze and said truthfully, ‘I never intended to...to lie about what happened. Or that you should lose your job.’

Andreas smiled, but it was harsh. ‘No, possibly you didn’t. You would have had your fun with me on the chaise longue of that boutique and then you would have gone on your way, with another notch on your busy bedpost. You forget that I know exactly what you girls were like: avaricous, bored and voracious. But you hadn’t counted on Papà finding you
in flagrante delicto,
and you made sure that he would not suspect his precious daughter had such base desires. It was much easier to accuse a poor Greek hotel employee.’

Siena blanched. That was exactly what she had done. But not for
her
survival, for her sister’s. That was something she could never imagine explaining to this intractable, vengeful man. Especially not when Serena was still so vulnerable. And not when Siena was still reeling with the effect he had on
her.

Andreas slashed his hand through the air and said curtly, ‘You’re right, though. Rehashing the past is of no use.’

Those dark blue eyes narrowed on Siena again, with a renewed gleam of something that looked suspiciously like determination.

‘Are you really telling me you’re so proud that you relish living like this?’ His voice became cajoling. ‘Don’t you miss sleeping until lunchtime and having nothing to worry about other than what time you’ve scheduled your beauty appointments or which dress you’ll wear that evening?’ He continued relentlessly. ‘Are you really expecting me to believe that you wouldn’t have all that back if you could? That you wouldn’t seize the opportunity to walk amongst your peers again?’

Siena felt sick. The thought of allowing this man to get any closer, where he could possibly discover the vulnerability hidden deep inside her, made her break out in a cold sweat. He thought she had the wherewithal to handle him, that it would be second nature, when she didn’t have the first clue about handling a man like him.

She pushed aside the fact that her apology had been as futile as she’d believed it would be and tossed her head in her most haughty fashion, eyes flashing. ‘I would prefer to clean your toilets rather than do as you’re suggesting. Perhaps you think that because I’m desperate I’ll say yes to becoming your mistress. Is that it, Xenakis?’

Andreas smiled and bared his teeth. ‘I thought I told you to call me Andreas—and, yes, I think you’ll agree because you miss your life of luxury. But, more than that, because despite everything you want me...’

Siena went cold. She did want him, but he had no clue who she really was, or why she’d had to betray him so awfully. He had no idea about the tender beating inner heart of her that had very fragile hopes and dreams for a life far from the one she knew. He only saw a spoilt ruined heiress and a way to humiliate her. Because she’d rejected him. He had no idea who she’d had to protect, and that
that
was why she’d let him be accused in the worst way possible. She’d had no choice.

She knew now that, if given a chance, this man would take her and humiliate her for his own pleasure. For revenge.

In her most cutting voice Siena said, ‘Contrary to your over-inflated view of your own levels of attraction, I
do not
want you. I may well be in a desperate situation
Mr Xenakis,
but I still have my pride and I wouldn’t become your mistress for your sick amusement if you were the last man on this earth.’

Andreas looked at the woman standing just a few feet away from him and felt like clapping. Her clothes were crumpled and stained, her hair was tumbled around her face and shoulders in messy golden abandon, but she could have been a queen berating a lowly subject. And he wanted her with a hunger bordering on the very word she’d used herself:
desperation.

He growled, ‘I’m not in the habit of propositioning women who don’t want me, Siena.’

She backed away at that, and reiterated with not a little desperation, ‘I
don’t
want you.’

‘Liar.’

She saw the danger in Andreas’s eyes. He advanced on her and she backed away, panic constricting her vocal cords, stopping her from saying anything. Panic at the awful, traitorous way her body was already getting hot, tingling with anticipation. If he kissed her now... Her mind blanked at the thought.

‘Once again you’re just too proud to admit you want me, Siena DePiero, and I’m going to prove how much you want me right now.’

It was insulting how easily Andreas was able to gather her into his arms and pull her close. From somewhere deep inside Siena dredged up the fight she needed. This man was far too dangerous to her. When he pulled her even closer and his head started to descend Siena acted on a visceral reflex to protect herself. She stiffened in his arms and lifted a hand to try and block his mouth from touching her. He obviously misread her intention and caught her wrist with lightning-fast reflexes. The strength of his grip made her gasp.

‘Oh, no, you don’t.’

Siena protested, ‘But I wasn’t—’

‘No?’ Andreas’s mouth was hard.

He didn’t believe her. Siena had never hit anyone in her life, and she felt sick at the thought that he could believe her capable of such violence.

‘I wouldn’t have hit you...’ she whispered, willing him to believe her, staring directly into fathomless deep blue eyes.

Andreas’s expression was stern. ‘And you won’t ever get the chance.’ The threat in his voice was a very sensual one.

He kept her close with one arm secure around her waist and let her wrist go to bring his other hand up to cup her jaw with surprising gentleness, considering what he’d believed her about to do. And then, before she could make another move, Andreas angled his head down and his mouth closed over hers.

Shock rendered Siena helpless against the sensual attack Andreas administered. His mouth moved over hers with a confidence that was heady, eliciting an immediate response from Siena that she wasn’t even aware of giving.

He was the only man who’d kissed her like this and she’d gone up in flames the first time. Nothing had changed. Heat pooled in her lower belly and spread slowly outwards, incinerating everything in its path. Her breasts tightened and felt heavy, achy. His arms around her were like a steel cage, but it was one she was pathetically loath to escape.

Siena was drowning in the scent of musky male, dimly aware of Andreas’s hand moving down her jaw, caressing, and his fingers undoing the tie at the throat of her shirt, opening the top buttons.

His tongue teased her lips, making her strain to get closer, to allow him access so that he could stroke his tongue along hers. This was the headiest of illicit pleasures...

Unbeknownst to Siena, her hands had unfurled from the fists they’d been against Andreas’s chest and were now spread out wide. She was up on tiptoe, as if to get closer to him. Andreas’s hand cupped the back of her head, fingers tangled in long, silky blonde strands of hair. His other hand gripped her hip, kneading the flesh, making Siena move against him.

It was only when she felt air touch the exposed flesh of her neck and throat that Siena came to her senses and pulled back. She looked up, completely dazed, into dark blue eyes. Heavy-lidded and explicitly sexual.

Slowly realisation came over her like a chill wind, making all that heady sensuality wither away. One touch and she’d become a slave to her senses. Unable to rationalise anything.

Siena used her hands to push back violently, almost falling over in the process.

A million and one things were clamouring in her head, but worst of all was that she’d spectacularly—in neon lights and with fireworks—humiliated herself. She winced when she recalled her haughty tones—‘
I don’t want you.’
And what had she just been doing? Proving herself a liar
again.

She grasped at her open shirt and couldn’t look Andreas in the eye. ‘I’d like you to leave now.’ Her voice sounded rusty and raw to her ears.

CHAPTER THREE

A
NDREAS
LOOKED
AT
Siena, holding onto her open shirt, looking almost shell-shocked, pale as the moonlight outside. His chest felt tight. This reaction was not something he’d expected. And then he realised: acting was second nature to this woman. It was in her blood—that made
his
blood boil. To have been duped again, even for a nanosecond...

His voice was harsh. ‘There’s no one here to cry wolf to now, Siena. You have to take responsibility for your actions.’

He started forward and suddenly her head came up. Her blue eyes were once again sparkling like jewels, her chin determined. Andreas stopped, his body still throbbing with heat. But he forced it back. Something hardened inside him. To think that for a second that he’d seen some kind of vulnerability...? Ludicrous.

He forced himself to be civilised when he felt anything but. ‘You still want me, Siena, and you can deny it all you want but it’s a lie. I am not leaving here without you tonight. You’ll pay for what you did:
in my bed.’

Siena opened her mouth and shut it again, shock pouring into her body. He sounded so utterly determined. As if he was prepared to carry her bodily from this place. Siena’s mind skittered away from that all too disturbing scenario to think of his other assertion. How could she deny she wanted him after that little display of complete lack of control? His words terrified her, though—his easy assumption that she would just
go with him.
Just as her father had always expected her to do his bidding.

She’d tasted personal freedom for the first time since their father had disappeared and it terrified her to think of someone dictating her every move again.

Siena dropped her hand from her open top buttons and lifted her chin. ‘You seriously think that I’ll just walk out of here with you? How unbelievably arrogant
are
you?’

Andreas’s eyes darkened ominously. ‘I paid a high price for your petulant need to save face with your father that night, Siena. I was sacked and blacklisted from every hotel in Europe overnight, and I had the very unsavoury rumour of my having forced myself on a woman dogging my heels. My fledgling career was ruined. I had to go to America to start again.’

Siena couldn’t bear to feel that shame again and she lashed out. ‘So—what? I pay you now by becoming your mistress?’

Andreas smiled and it was feral. ‘That and more, Siena DePiero. You pay me by admitting to yourself
and me
just how much you want me.’

She looked at this man in the soft light of her grotty flat. He was standing like a maurauding pirate, legs firmly planted wide apart. Chest broad and powerful. Strip away the civilised veneer of the tuxedo and this man was a pure urban animal of the most potent kind.

He’s been looking for you for six months. He’s not just going to walk away
... The realisation sent tendrils of panic mixed with something much more humiliatingly exciting through Siena’s blood. The confines of the tiny flat seemed to draw in around them even more.

She emitted a curt laugh to hide her trepidation. ‘So—what? You’d lock me into your penthouse apartment and take me out like a toy of some kind for your pleasure only?’ She’d been aiming to sound scathing but her voice betrayed her, sounding almost as if she was considering this.

Andreas’s eyes gleamed in the dim light and he smiled. ‘I can’t deny that that image does have its appeal, but, no, I’d have no problem being seen with you in public.
I
don’t have an issue with public opinion—unlike some people.’

Andreas was looking at her coolly, clearly waiting for her to say something.

‘And what then?’ she asked, feeling a little hysterical at being in this situation, discussing this with Andreas Xenakis. ‘You just drop me back here at the side of the road when you’re done?’

Andreas’s mouth firmed. ‘I take care of all my...lovers.’ He shrugged negligently. ‘They’re usually self-sufficient, but with your range of language skills alone I don’t doubt that with a little help you could find a decent job...certainly something better than menial labour.’

Siena laughed. The hysteria was taking over. Controlling herself with an effort, she looked at Andreas. ‘This truly is a turn-up for the books, isn’t it?
You
offering to help
me
find a job...’

Siena’s cutting voice was hiding one of her deepest vulnerabilities: the fact that she had no qualification beyond her exclusive education. Yes, she had numerous languages and could speak them fluently. Yes, she knew how to host a dinner party for fifty people and more. Yes, she knew how to arrange flowers and how to behave in front of royalty and diplomats, how to conduct conversation ranging from world politics to the history of art... But when it came to the real world—real life—she knew nothing. Had no skills or qualifications. She’d been destined for a life of social politics. And Andreas knew that.

She prayed he wouldn’t touch her again and moved around him on wobbly legs to open the front door. There were no more disturbing sounds coming from her neighbours. She looked back into the room with relief, to see that Andreas had followed her. But the relief was short-lived when he gently but firmly pushed the door shut again.

Sounding eminently reasonable, Andreas said, ‘I’m offering you an opportunity, Siena, a chance to move upwards and make a life for yourself again.’

Siena crossed her arms against this threat. He wasn’t moving. She forced herself to look up at him. Her mouth twisted and she spoke her fears. ‘We both know it’s not an
offer,
Andreas. You haven’t spent six months searching for me to just walk away.’

He smiled again and agreed equably, ‘No, I haven’t. It really wouldn’t be such a chore, Siena... I’d see to it that you enjoyed yourself. You’d want for nothing.’

‘For as long as your interest lasts?’

His face immediately became more stark and Siena knew she’d hit a nerve. She was intrigued despite herself. ‘That’s all I’m offering, Siena. A finite amount of time as my lover until we’re both ready to move on. I have no desire for anything more permanent—certainly not with you.’

Siena barely registered his insult. She was fighting against his dark pull and she opened the door again—only to have Andreas reach out lazily and shut it. She wanted to stamp her feet and glared at him.

‘Look, Xenakis—’

‘No!’

His voice stopped the breath in her throat. He looked fierce and magnificent in the gloom. He came closer and her heart thudded painfully.

‘
You
look. This is only going to end one way: by you agreeing to come with me now. If you want a further demonstration of how susceptible you are to me then by all means I’m happy to provide it here and now, but—’ He cut himself off and looked around the room with clear disgust, then back to Siena. ‘I personally would prefer to make love to you for the first time in more...luxurious surroundings.’

The thought and, worse, the knowledge that he could take her here if he so wanted made Siena move further away. She felt as if a noose was tightening around her neck.

Andreas watched as Siena distanced herself and curbed the almost animalistic urge he had to put her over his shoulder and carry her bodily out of this pathetic, stinking place. His blood was boiling with lust and determination. As soon as his mouth had touched hers he’d known with a visceral certainty that he would
not
be leaving her behind in this place. He didn’t like to admit that a part of him couldn’t bear to think of her in these surroundings. It was like dropping a perfect diamond into the filthiest of stagnant ponds.

Trying to curb the impatience he felt, Andreas pointed out, ‘You don’t have anyone to turn to, Siena. If you’re hoping for some blue-blooded knight to ride up on a white horse and forgive you the sins of your father it’s not going to happen. Don’t forget—I
know
your sins.’

Siena turned to face Andreas again, hugging her arms even tighter around herself, unaware of how huge her eyes looked in her face.

His words had cut her far deeper than she wanted him to see. He was right. She didn’t have anyone to turn to. She and Serena did have an older half-brother, but she had little doubt that after the treatment he’d received at the hands of their father, not to mention the way Siena and her sister had ignored him so blatantly when they’d seen him in the street the day he’d confronted their father, he would not relish her getting in touch out of the blue. He had become a billionaire financier against all the odds and must despise her just as he must despise their father, for humiliating him like a dog in the street.

Her sister was in no position to be of any support and never really had been, despite being the older by two years. And that brought Siena back to the stark realisation that
she
might have no one to turn to, but Serena was expecting to turn to Siena when she needed her. And she needed her now. Dismay filled her. How could she have forgotten even for a moment about Serena?

The hectic pulse of her blood mocked her. The reason was standing just feet away from her. Siena could feel the fight draining from her weary body. A sense of inevitability washed over her. It had been no coincidence that Andreas had met her tonight. He’d
searched
for her. And he would not rest now he knew where she was. She had nowhere else to go. Nowhere to hide. No resources.

As if he sensed the direction her thoughts were taking, Siena could see Andreas’s eyes flash triumphantly in the gloom.

Suddenly, as if she’d been injected with a dose of adrenalin, her brain became clear. Thinking of her sister focused her thoughts.
If
she was going to walk out of this apartment with this man she had to make sure that the one person who needed
her
was going to benefit.

The thought of telling Andreas about her sister, appealing to his humanity, was anathema. If anything, this evening had proved just how far Andreas was willing to go to seek his revenge. If she told him about Serena he might very well use her against Siena in some way, exactly as her father had. Siena shivered at the very thought. No way could she ever let that happen again.

She knew, though, that the very audacious plan forming in her head would ensure Andreas’s hatred of her for ever.

* * *

Andreas’s blood hummed with anticipation as he watched the woman who stood just feet away, her chin still lifted defiantly, even though they both knew she was about to give in. She would be
his.
Her little act of pride had just been an exercise in proving to Andreas that he was still the last man she’d choose on earth, even if there was enough heat between them to melt an iceberg. And even if she
was
desperate.

His mouth tightened into a line. If anything it just proved that he was right: Siena wanted out of her challenging circumstances and back into the world she knew so well.

All
he
cared about was sating this burning desire inside him. Witnessing Siena DePiero swallow her pride and her denial of their mutual attraction would be a delicious revenge, and the very least he deserved after suffering so acutely at her hands.

‘Well, Siena? What’s it to be?’

Siena hated the smug tone of arrogance in Andreas’s voice. She couldn’t believe she was even contemplating what she was about to do, but assured herself she could do this. She had to.

In a way it should be easy—she’d merely be reverting to the type she’d played well for as long as she could remember: that of a privileged heiress with nothing more on her mind than the dress she’d wear to the next charity function. No one except for Serena had ever known of her deep hatred of that vacuous world where people routinely stabbed one another in the back to get ahead. Where emotions were so calcified that no reaction was genuine.

Before she could lose her nerve altogether, Siena blurted out, ‘I will come with you—right now if you wish.’ She saw Andreas’s slow smile of triumph curling his mouth and said quickly, before he thought he was about to have everything his way, ‘But I have terms for this...if we’re to embark on...’ Words failed her. She simply could not articulate what he wanted and expected. What she’d agreed to in her head.

He arched a dark brow. ‘This affair? Becoming lovers? Companions?’

Siena flushed. The word
companions,
even though he’d meant it sarcastically, struck her somewhere very deep and secret. They would never be companions.

Feeling agitated, she moved behind her one rickety chair, putting her hands on its back as if it could provide support. She nodded once, jerkily. ‘Yes. I have terms.’

Andreas folded his arms across his chest. He looked almost amused, and Siena welcomed this as it made the fire grow in her belly. He only wanted her for one thing, and she was only exploiting him for his desire.

Baldly she declared, ‘I want money.’ And then she winced inwardly. She’d been brought up to be the ultimate society diplomat, yet here with this man she regressed to someone barely able to string a sentence together. She was too raw around him. She couldn’t call up that fake polite veneer if her life depended on it.

As Andreas registered Siena’s words something dark solidified in his gut. He should have expected this. A woman like Siena DePiero would never come for free. She would expect him to pay handsomely for the privilege of bedding her. As much as he’d paid for touching her in the first place.

Disgust evident in his voice, he said coolly, ‘I’ve never paid for a woman in my life and I’m not about to start now.’

Siena went as pale as parchment and Andreas had to curb the urge to sneer.
How
could she look so vulnerable when she was effectively standing there asking for payment to be his mistress?

Two spots of colour bloomed then in her cheeks and bizarrely he felt comforted. He could see her struggling with whatever she wanted to say. Finally she got out, ‘Those are my terms. I want a sum of money or else I’m not going anywhere—and if you come near me I’ll scream the place down.’