A Sweethaven Summer (12 page)

“Finding out my mother’s father lives around the corner—I
hadn’t bargained for that.” Her bottom lip quivered, and she willed herself not to cry. Adele put an arm around her and led her into the living room.

“You didn’t know about him?” Lila asked.

Campbell shook her head. “Mom said her parents died. In the crash right after I was born.”

“Adele, did you know that?” Jane sat down on the sofa.

Adele sighed. “I did. Honey, your grandpa is a friend of mine. I didn’t want to say anything because, well, y’all just got here and I thought we’d talk about it all tonight.”

At that moment, Luke burst through the door, wild-eyed. His eyes met Campbell’s, and he stared at her for a long moment—almost as if he were asking for forgiveness.

And she knew he hadn’t done anything wrong. Not really.

“So you knew too,” Campbell said to Luke. “That my grandfather lived in town.”

His face fell, and he avoided her eyes. “I’m sorry, Cam. I tried to talk you out of it. I thought we’d hurry by. I didn’t know he’d be coming out of the house.” He met her eyes. “I’m really sorry.”

She held his gaze for a long moment and finally looked away. It didn’t make sense to blame him. It wasn’t his fault her mom had lied to her. But then, blaming the dead wouldn’t get her anywhere either.

She glanced at the clock. Nine thirty. She could still make it back to Chicago tonight if she left now. She could go to the reading and then spend the weekend getting the house ready to sell. The whole idea held no appeal for her, but she’d already found more information in Sweethaven than she’d bargained for. Campbell hated knowing that her mom had lied to her. It made her wonder if they’d really been as close as she thought they were—and that threatened to change her memories. Thinking about it scared her.
Maybe Tilly was right. Maybe coming here in this ridiculous hunt for a father was a huge mistake.

She had to face the reality that these women didn’t know who her father was—and that alone was reason to go.

Her mind spun with images of the lanky man from the funeral. The pain she saw in his eyes that day was still there—she saw it when he looked at her that night.

And suddenly Campbell didn’t feel like fighting for the truth anymore.

Campbell gathered from the dresser the few toiletries she’d unpacked and stuffed them in her bag. The quiet of the guest room didn’t offer any comfort. If anything, it wrapped itself around her like a straitjacket, taunted, tormented. Just like that, she was seven years old again, watching Alison Temberly walk past her house to the park, hand-in-hand with her tall, handsome father. In a second, the rejection had weaseled its way back in without her permission.

She’d come for answers and had gotten nothing but more questions. Her grandparents were alive and yet her mother never allowed her to meet them? Why? Was she really that selfish? Were they really that vicious? She was tired of thinking her mother must’ve had her reasons. Of course she did, but that didn’t make them good ones.

That didn’t keep her from hurting.

Campbell startled at a gentle knock on the door. She blotted under her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt and busied herself with packing. Or at least pretending to pack.

“Come in,” she said.

Jane appeared on the other side of the door. “I came to check on you.”

Campbell looked away.

“May I sit?” Jane motioned to the armchair in the corner.

Campbell nodded.

“Your mom and I were really close.” Jane studied her feet. “I wish I could’ve said that more recently, but unfortunately, we fell out of touch.”

“I’m sure it wasn’t anyone’s fault.”

Jane’s smile was almost patronizing, as if to tell her she didn’t really understand. “I think Lila and Meghan assumed I knew she’d gotten pregnant, you know, before she told us. Before she sent that scrapbook page. But I didn’t. I was so hurt that she didn’t tell me, I think I missed her cry for help.”

Campbell frowned. “What do you mean?”

“She came to me. When you were a baby. It was a Friday night and I had plans to go to the football game at my school. I remember because I was supposed to meet Graham there. Our first date.” She smiled. “I was so excited.” Jane closed her eyes, as if going to a different place.

Jane had been so nervous to see Graham Atkins. She’d spent over an hour in front of the mirror that night, then emerged from the house and prayed her old white Citation would start. She could not miss that game.

A voice cut her trek to the car short.

“Janie?”

The stark light of the street lamp out front cast a dark shadow on a girl standing next to an old green car. Jane squinted, trying—but failing—to place the vehicle.

“It’s Suzanne.”

“Suzanne?” Jane headed toward her and pulled her into a tight hug. “Where’ve you been? I tried calling.”

Suzanne clung to her for a long moment until finally Jane pulled back and looked at her. “Are you okay?”

Suzanne nodded and wiped a stray tear from her cheek. “I had a baby.” She smiled and cried at the same time.

“I know. Was it a girl or a boy?”

“A girl.” Suzanne looked at the car. “Her name’s Campbell.”

“Aw, Suzanne, that’s so pretty.” Jane looked in the back window and spotted the sleeping baby that barely filled the car seat. Such a sweet baby with that one little tuft of hair on her otherwise bald head. “She’s beautiful.”

“Her middle name is Jane.” Suzanne looked at her.

“It is?” Jane swelled with pride. Suzanne had named the baby after
her?

“She’s four and a half months already.” Suzanne smiled at her daughter.

“How are you, Suzie?” Jane read the worn-out expression on her friend’s face.

“I’m okay. I was thinking about you when I was driving so I thought I’d stop. I had your address in my book.

“I’m heading to a football game. Do you want to come?”

Suzanne looked away. “I doubt they’d appreciate a baby at a football game.” She laughed. “Besides, it might be a little loud for her.”

An awkward silence fell between them. Jane searched for words. She’d never struggled to find them with Suzanne before.

“How long can you stay?” Jane finally asked.

“Not long. I just wanted to say hi and introduce you to my baby.”

“She’s really beautiful, Suzanne. Do you want to come in? I can skip the game.” Jane tried to sound sincere, but Graham’s handsome smile skittered through her mind. The thought of missing their date turned her stomach, but he would understand, right?

Would Suzanne pick up on her eagerness to leave?

“No, no. I can’t stay.” Suzanne ran her hand through her long brown hair and for a moment looked a little lost.

“Are you sure?” She felt relief, then guilt when Suzanne turned
her down. “I really can skip it. It’s just—there’s this boy.” Jane smiled.

“I knew you’d probably have plans. You’ll have to call and tell me all about him. I’m just glad I caught you.”

“Suzanne, wait.” Jane ran over to her car and fished through the mess in the backseat. She located the scrapbook, then walked back toward her friend.

“You should have this,” Jane said.

Suzanne took the book from her, wrapped her thin fingers around the edges. “Oh, Jane, I couldn’t. I don’t think I’ll be going back to Sweethaven. But the scrapbook should still go.”

“No. It was your idea. It’s your book. We all agreed. We did our pages from this past summer, but we left a couple of blank ones. For you to scrapbook your summer. The baby and everything.” Jane smiled, but Suzanne looked troubled.

“I missed this,” she said. Tears filled her eyes.

Jane studied her friend. “What’s going on, Suzanne? What’s wrong?” Jane laid a hand on Suzanne’s arm.

“Nothing.” She closed the book and hugged it to her chest. “I will treasure this always.” She pulled Jane into a tight hug. “Will you tell Lila and Meg I love them?”

“What do you mean? We can all get together. Maybe we can come see you or something. You really don’t think you’ll ever come back to Sweethaven? It’s not the same without you.”

Suzanne paused, then looked away. “Things are kind of a mess right now.”

Jane glanced at the sleeping baby in Suzanne’s back seat. “Can I do anything?”

Suzanne shook her head. “I’m fine. Just gotta figure some things out.”

A helpless feeling washed over Jane like a splash of ice water.

“I should let you get to your game.” Suzanne opened the car door.

“Can I ask you one more thing?”

Suzanne turned and looked at Jane. “Anything.”

Jane set her jaw and then blurted out, “Who’s the dad?”

Suzanne studied the road with an odd intensity. “It’s kind of complicated, Janie.”

Suzanne’s refusal hit her like a punch in the gut. “Okay.” She considered guessing—throwing names out there and judging Suzanne’s reactions—but decided against it. If Suzanne wanted to tell her, she would. No sense pushing the issue and making herself feel more like a fool. “Well, if you need me, I’m here, okay?”

Suzanne nodded again. “Thanks for the scrapbook, Jane. I really appreciate it. It’ll keep us all together.”

Jane smiled. “Call me when you get back home, okay?”

“Sure.”

Suzanne closed the car door and waved before she drove away.

But she never called.

And Jane never saw her again.

Campbell watched Jane as she recounted that day. Clearly she blamed herself for not realizing how badly her mom needed help.

“Do you think they kicked her out that day?” Campbell asked.

Jane shrugged. “I don’t know. As a parent, I can’t imagine ever doing that to my daughter, but Cathy—your grandmother—well, she was pretty stubborn. She might’ve kicked her out just to prove a point.”

“And they never worked things out?”

“I don’t think so, hon. I always hoped they’d made their peace, but I guess not.”

Campbell stood and began folding then re-folding the same
T-shirt. She couldn’t understand why her mom lied to her all those years about having extended family, why she didn’t make things right with her own mother. It contradicted everything she knew about her mom. “It’s hard to believe. Mom and I were so close. I can’t imagine her having such a bad relationship with her own mother.”

“Suzanne obviously wanted to be a different kind of mom. She did a good job with you, Campbell.”

Campbell zipped the bag, then met Jane’s eyes. She allowed a weak smile. “But what about that scrapbook? If you gave it back to Mom, why didn’t she have the entire thing?”

Jane sighed. “The following summer, it arrived on my doorstep. Your mom wanted The Circle to continue, and she knew it wouldn’t if we didn’t have the book. We tried, but it just wasn’t the same without Suzanne. In the end, Adele talked us into splitting it up. That way, we each got part of the memories. We went through and each took out our favorite pages, setting aside the ones we thought your mom should have.”

“But it’ll never be complete again,” Campbell said.

“Not unless Meghan sends us her pages.”

“Or comes back.” Campbell watched Jane’s expression change.

Jane stuttered, fumbled for words.

“Why do you think she’s not here?”

“I couldn’t say,” Jane said simply. “I haven’t spoken to her in over six years.”

“Can I ask why?” Campbell avoided Jane’s eyes, scanning the guest room one last time for anything she might have missed.

Jane took a deep breath. “It’s a story for another day, I think.” She stood and looked at Campbell. “I keep wondering what would’ve happened if I’d stayed with her that night instead of going to meet Graham at the football game.”

“You might not be married to him,” Campbell said.

“Or I might never have lost touch with your mom.” Regret cooled Jane’s face. “I hate all these ‘what-ifs.’ ” She turned to leave. “I’m sorry you’re finding this all out right after losing your mom. It’s so unfair.”

“Life isn’t fair.” Campbell flipped the lid of the suitcase and zipped it up.

“Adele and Lila and I already started a list of possibilities. Who knows, maybe it
was
someone in that art class.”

“Maybe.”

“If you stay we could—”

Campbell cut her off. “I’ll think about it.”

She remembered Lila’s speculation that her mother hadn’t loved the guy. How it’d just been a terrible mistake—one that had cost her mother everything. Friends. Parents. A future. How different would things have been if she’d given Campbell away—or never had her at all?

The threat of having her heart broken, or running into her grandfather again, wrung out her insides like a sponge.

She’d lost her courage. She needed to go. She couldn’t endure the pain of uncovering more of Mom’s secrets. It had started to change the way she felt about her mother, and Campbell couldn’t risk that.

She slung her bag over her shoulder.

“Good-bye, Jane.”

The quiet of the car should’ve comforted her, but Campbell’s thoughts somersaulted through her mind, making peace impossible. She’d made the right choice. Leaving Sweethaven—leaving her mom’s friends and her not-dead grandfather—was the right thing to do. So why did she now find herself parked at the Boardwalk, admiring the full moon glowing behind the lighthouse? Why couldn’t she drive straight out of town and keep on going until she reached Tee Street—her mom’s house?

Campbell got out of the car and walked along the lake, reminded again that she was far from the city. She replayed the moment she stood face to face with her grandfather—a man she didn’t know existed. He’d been there all along, only a couple of hours away. But he’d never tried to find them. He hadn’t cared enough about her or Mom to right the wrongs of the past.

She shook the thoughts away, but she knew the pain of his rejection was nothing compared to what she’d feel if she discovered her father had abandoned her in the same way.

Leaving had to be the right thing.

She pulled her sweatshirt around her torso and hugged herself, walking back to the car. She turned the key in the ignition and hit Seek on the radio. A little music would drown out the thoughts bombardingher mind.